SCOTT: Today we interview the noble Native American, who some call Indian. They'reTheir enlightened ancestors roamed the idyllic plains of ancient North America long before any European appeared to foul the land with their wretched modernity and economy and philosophy and their fashion magazines. Tell us, noble aboriginal American, do you weep for your people, dispossessed and scattered, robbed and broken?
KEVIN: Dude, I told you. I'm Korean. I have no idea what you're talking about.
SCOTT: Isn't Korean an Indian tribe?
KEVIN: No, dude. I'm Asian.
SCOTT: Right, but aren't Indians Asian?
KEVIN: No. They're American.
SCOTT: But, what about Gandhi?
KEVIN: Oh. Well... I mean... That's, like, INDIA Indians.
SCOTT: Can I see your wigwam?
KEVIN: Dude, I'm straight. I'm going to take off.
SCOTT: Can I get a ride home? I can't remember where I left my car.
KEVIN: I don't think so.
Hello, friends. How are you today?
Later. Love.
