Dear greeting card corporation,
I know this is a busy time for you guys, and you are undoubtedly under a great deal of stress. Nevertheless, I feel you may be rushing to meet demands and slipping a little on your quality assurance practices. (At the advice of the Caveat Emptor Legal Dream Team, I'll not mention the name of your company. Suffice it to say that your brand is usually considered a hallmark of quality in your industry. Some consider you the very best.)
My wife purchased one of your cash holder cards for our nephew. Upon inspection of the card, however, she decided it may not be appropriate for a thirteen-year-old. Here is the inscription:
I'd like to specifically point out the letter "T" on the word "tucked". Compare this "T", if you would, with all the other "T"s in the inscription. Does it look a little odd to you? It looks a lot like an "F", in my estimation. This is a problem, don't you agree?
I'm sure your company doesn't sponsor this type of language officially. I'm sure some employee was just having a good time at your expense. Nevertheless, I would hope someone would glance at these before millions are printed and shipped to stores across the nation.
I'll never be able to say, "Hey, honey, why don't you come tuck me in bed?" again without thinking impure thoughts. I'll never be able to listen to Tanya Tucker or watch Tuck Everlasting. You've scarred me for life.
As a consumer and a parent, I'm asking you to do a better job. As a blogger, I say, "God bless you. And God bless us, every one."
Sincerely,
A. Scott White
