No matter what I do, no matter how humble and inconspicuous I try to be, I always end up starting new trends that spread around the world like a mighty, rushing wind. This is, no doubt, something all of you discuss each day as you stand around the water cooler and laugh or sigh with your coworkers about my recent exploits and/or shenanigans. "That Scott," you say, shaking your head and smiling. "That Scott."
This is how I imagine the world, but not really. Wouldn't that be great, though? Wouldn't it? No? Oh, okay.
So, anyhoo, we are apparently trying to jump start a new expression. The expression? Pig Thumbs. Yes, you read that correctly. Pig Thumbs. It all started like this:
- She said: Pigs don't have thumbs.
- I said: Then where does the expression "Pig Thumbs" come from? Oh, that's right, I just made it up. Man, I've really got pig thumbs tonight.
And it was decided that pig thumbs would become ubiquitous or we'd die trying.
So, what does it mean? Well, that's what I'm trying to decide. "Pig" implies greediness or gluttony in most cases. Thumbs? Hmmm... There's "green thumb", implying skill in working with plants. There "thumbing my way to Houston", hitchhiking. "All thumbs" implies a lack of manual dexterity. To "thumb your nose" at someone means to snub them. Mick Jagger has that dirty dog that once held him down "under his thumb", meaning under his control.
Of course, it could always be used like "bee's knees" or "cat's meow". You could say, admirably, "That Scott takes the cake, I tell you. He's awesome. He's the pig's thumbs." Hmmm...
Now, I'm an odd person, with a dry sense of humor. I would find it funny to invent an expression that you could just throw in anywhere and it could mean whatever you want it to mean. Its lack of specific meaning, or abundance of general meaning, is, in itself, a funny joke to me. Some people, however, have to have everything pig thumbs, you know. The expression may not catch on, may not become the pig's thumbs, unless it has a clear definition and usage.
So, what do you think? You guys are smart. Heck, you're the pig's thumbs in my book. Guide me. Lead me. Mold me. Bend me, shape me, any way you want me.
Later. Love.
P.S. - I put a new post, specificity, out on my cogito writing site. It's an exercise in telling an event several times with increasing specificity. It's a tad long, but, if it souds interesting to you at all, check it out. Thanks for stopping by.
